"Successful therapy starts with the therapist entering rapport with the client. Successful relationships require at least one person going into rapport with the other."
Eli Jaxon-Bear
Rapport
In order to enter rapport, you can't bring your own baggage along with you. If you are empty and aware; if you don't know anything in particular but are curious; you can then enter rapport with the other’s trance. If you are projecting your own trance onto the other, you cannot enter rapport.
Generally, we expect the other to enter rapport with us. If the other experiences something different from what is expected or has another point of view or is confused or confrontational, they are often subtly blamed and called
resistant. As the therapist, or as the True Friend, your job is to enter the other’s trance. To enter the other’s trance, you must drop your own. It's that simple. In dropping your own, you can be fully present, fully open and curious.
Rapport can mean confirming what the other is saying, matching their energy, rhythm, breathing, posture and tone. It means not adding your own “spin” to what the other is saying, but rather being curious about what they mean, even if it seems obvious.
It is a skillful way of being in relationship, and is a natural progression when being a True Friend for the world.
To be in rapport, to drop your own agenda, is a skillful and loving way to meet whoever it is you come into contact with.
